With only one week to go before the threat of the Summer Hellidays became a grave, grave reality, Mummy decided she'd better start busying herself with all the things she'd been putting off since September. She started by digging a grave for herself (or indeed for the purpose of temporary "time out" for any Terror… Continue reading Yr 6 Graduation: Epic Mum Fail No.11,367
If ever a woman utters the word "fine," you can be sure of one thing: SHE IS NOT FINE. IT IS NOT FINE. NOTHING IS EVER FINE.
Perhaps you are lying next to a cold, frigid Mombie in bed. Or perhaps you yourself are a Mombie who hasn't woken up yet from the nightmare.
At what age is it not acceptable for Mummies to go out anymore?
You know you're getting on when you receive an invitation to attend your High School Reunion. But this wasn't just any old invitation. It wasn't simply for a quick catch up and some snapchat selfies over coffee. This was for the Mother of all Reunions: The 20 Year Biggie. A chance to reconnect, reminisce and… Continue reading High School Reunion
When your Mother buys you a book with 248 pages solely dedicated to transforming "your home into a permanently tidy, clutter-free space," and with the precursor, "You're probably not going to like this Dear," you know you're in trouble. Last year and crucially, last year, my Mother gifted Marie Kondo's "The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying" to… Continue reading The Magic of Space
Happy May Day! Luckily for us Great Brits, this year May 1st fell on a Monday, which meant another Glorious and Great British Bank Holiday for us all to enjoy. But today wasn't going to be about BBQ's, queues and booze. Today was to be about fun and frolics at the village fete, fairies, faun, flowers and phallic looking… Continue reading MayDay MayDay
Roll on the Great British Bank Holiday. A delightful long weekend in which important, tired and hard-working people get to rest their weary heads, and less important but equally as tired and hard-working FTM's get to, quite frankly, carry on regardless. A joyful time in which the Great British Public love to either a) inebriate themselves over three consecutive days, whilst manning a… Continue reading The Great British Bank Holiday
The GR has resurrected herself. Bang on cue. Just in time for Easter. It's Day 1 of the "holidays" and her timing is impeccable once again. Her little-black-cloak has been dry-cleaned, in honour of the numerous jollifications planned and her scythe has been sharpened, ready to strike anyone or anything that, quite frankly, has the audacity to Gd'dam… Continue reading The Resurrection
So here's the thing. For the past year or so, I've been involved in an arrangement. A you-scratch-my-back-and-i'll scratch-yours type of thing. In fact, I could easily go as far as to call it a relationship. A mutually beneficial, reciprocal kind of relationship, which saw its inception at the school gates. At first I was dubious, but after… Continue reading Car Share