Apparently I have a new pet name. I call it a “pet”name in a last-ditch attempt to glean even the tiniest scrap of cuddly, candy-floss cuteness from it’s damn-right pettiness. Today and only today, I am willing to call it a “pet” name, in the spirit of February 14th (AKA Valentine’s Day), on which day surely everyone is entitled to a bit of petting. However, on every other day, it’s a nick name at best, an insult at worst. Continue reading “The G.R”
Since becoming an FTM, I figured that it was about time I stepped up to the plate and become an FTW at the same time. Yes, that’s right. A full-time-mum and a full-time-wife. A mean feat after nearly eight years handcuffed together in sworn allegiance. But with two for the price of one, my other-half was going to be overjoyed. So how could I deprive him any longer? Continue reading “The Full-time Wife”
Last week the Mr and I celebrated having survived another year of marriage, quite remarkably, to each other. And what better way to mark yet another year of wonderful wedded bliss and matrimonial melodramas, than by having ourselves a very clean weekend away with one another. Plus two.
Happy anniversary Darling.
You see, my old fellow and I are not the most romantic duo you’ll ever meet. Romeo and Juliet we most certainly are not. Having booked this months in advance, as less of a pre-planned anniversary treat and more of a timely coincidence, the only thing on offer this weekend was an advance purchase rate and a couple of complimentary chocolate chip cookies. And with myself, the hormonal back-seat driver, and our very own double-trouble, squabbling, squawking, terrible twosome in tow, our celebratory cruise down the motorway was doomed from the outset. Continue reading “The Seven Year Itch”
You don’t swear.
Apparently it’s unbecoming of a lady.
So when on the odd occasion you do blaspheme, we know it’s serious.
It really must be serious,
For Mums don’t swear. Or at least, we’re not supposed to. And certainly not in public. So that would explain why my propensity towards off-loading shit in a most foul-mouthed and profane manner is not something for which you take the credit. Bloody hell.
But Thank Goodness this isn’t all about me. Continue reading “65 Reasons”
Recently I had a date. Boyish good looks, medium height, of average build. Rugged [from afar], unshaven [from up close]. Big brown eyes, floppy hair, T-shirt, jeans, holes, creases – the works.
Oh and married.
Double trouble? Apparently not. For, despite his 1 out of 10 for effort, my internet-acquired beau and I had rather a lot in common. Six years and nine days of ever-so holy matrimony and two ever-so cleverly created children to be precise. So what was with the date? Continue reading “Marriage Management”
I must have blinked
Because a year has gone by
And I didn’t notice
You change. Continue reading “At One Today”
It’s February 14th.
It’s February 14th…and?
It’s February 14th and Cupid has well and truly landed in our house. Sadly, he didn’t land on my lap [apparently I have more than enough strings on my bow]. And surprisingly enough, he didn’t land amid the bills in today’s post. Instead, his arrow was pointing firmly in the direction of Esther. She’s only gone and found herself love. And it’s love of the “true” kind obviously. All at the tender age of four and three-quarters. Continue reading “Love Untold”